Each year around this time, there are dozens of parents across New England ready to jump off the deep end due to their aspiring hockey player going undrafted in the USHL or failing to advance to USA Hockey Player Development Camps.
Chances are this won’t be the last time your child falls short of an intended goal. Very few rising juniors in high school will actually commit to a Division 1 college hockey program on or around Aug. 1.
None of these three milestones are make-or-break for your young hockey player. A number of players who were drafted to the USHL or who made national camp will be out of hockey in a few years. It’s been well-chronicled over the past half dozen or so years that committing to a Division 1 college certainly doesn’t guarantee getting there and being in the lineup.
There are also plenty of examples of players who flourished despite not making national camps or going undrafted in the USHL at younger ages. It’s not the end of the world. Instruct your child to use it as motivation.
After all, one of the best feelings in life is proving the naysayers wrong.
Here are three steps to take when dealing with the rejection of not making national camp or not being drafted by a USHL organization.
1. Take responsibility
While it’s true politics sometimes play a role in a player getting drafted or making a national camp, for the most part evaluators at district tryout festivals and scouts and coaches do their best to pick the best players.
The optimal way to help your child learn from rejection is to help him identify why he didn’t get selected or drafted. Chances are your child is a good hockey player. Just being in contention for the USHL Draft and national camp means a player is talented. By making it to the festival or Final 40, your child still achieved significantly more than a large chunk of the players in his birth year.
Speak to your player's coach and advisor, and listen attentively. Ask what he’s good at and what he needs to improve upon in order to make national camp or get drafted next year. Even the best players in the world are trying to fine-tune their game.
Parents who blame others or make excuses for their players aren’t helping them in the long run. It might make him feel good for a few minutes to say he got jobbed, but it bodes poorly for the future.
2. Don’t blame others
Now having worked in hockey for a decade, I’ve heard countless stories of players or their parents firing their advisor following a shortcoming. Whether it’s not making the NTDP Evaluation Camp, not getting drafted in the USHL or NHL, or not getting a college commitment, it’s been blamed on the advisor.
There are good and bad advisors. Some are charging a hefty amount of money to advocate for your player. They should be held accountable for that and you should certainly feel like you are getting a good return for your payment.
However, do not fire the advisor because your son didn’t make national camp or didn’t get drafted into the USHL. I can assure you that every good advisor out there has players who got drafted and ones who didn’t.
REFLECTION: Advice to future USHL prospects from ex-prep hockey players
Your son didn’t get drafted or didn’t make national camp because of his current ability level. It has nothing to do with the advisor.
On a similar note to what I mentioned above and what I’ve written before, make sure any advisor you choose for your son is able to identify the type of player he is and his strengths and weaknesses. The advisor that just tells you how great your son is and how he can help him get to where you and he want him to go isn’t worth it.
3. Set reasonable expectations
Most aspiring players in New England want to play Division 1 college hockey on the way to fulfilling a lifelong dream of making it to the NHL. The odds are stacked against most players from accomplishing this feat.
While I’m in no way suggesting that you shouldn’t allow your son to do everything in his power to make the most of his ability, it’s important to recognize that there are other good things to come from hockey than just making it to the highest level.
As I alluded to earlier, just making a varsity roster at the high school or prep school level should be considered an achievement. Playing Division 3 college hockey is an even bigger accomplishment and one that isn’t always met with the positivity it should.
IT’S NOT ALWAYS EASY: Inside the transition from prep school to the USHLÂ
Try to set goals for your son that he can realistically meet in the short term, whether that’s helping his team win a championship in 2023-24, scoring a certain amount of goals or points, or having a positive plus/minus. Work towards being drafted by an NCDC or NAHL team.
Hockey is supposed to be fun. Just look at NHL Stanley Cup playoff star Matthew Tkachuk of the Florida Panthers. It’s obvious he’s having fun and enjoying the moment. While he’s an incredibly gifted hockey player, he plays with swagger and confidence. You can tell hockey isn’t just a job to him. It’s what he loves to do.
If all your son is thinking about is making the NTDP, getting drafted, or earning a college commitment on Aug. 1, chances are that’s undue pressure that can result in burnout.
