|
March
10, 2005
STATE OF THE GAMESavor the Little Things, Enjoy the
Ride
By Lyle Phair | From 
For some strange reason, now that the hockey season
is about halfway over, for many parents the focus suddenly shifts
to next year. What will be happening? Where will “we”
be playing? What is the next step on the ladder for “us”?
What are the teams that “we” should be trying out for?
Which coach will be the best for “our” development?
I would bet that for most players, those thoughts
are the furthest things from their minds. They are enjoying the
moment, the team they are on, the coach they are playing for and
the players they are playing with now.
Unless of course, their parents have filled their
heads with the notion that they are too good for that team, or the
coach is not using them properly or that the other players are holding
them back from achieving their full potential.
Unfortunately, for some reason many people can’t
just enjoy the moment. They have to be thinking about the next step.
I guess, in some respects, that is the American way. Finding a way
to get ahead, getting the edge on the competition. And in most cases,
there is nothing wrong with that. But does it have to apply to kids’
sports?
I think that, more than ever, parents today think
that their kid has the potential to “go somewhere”,
and “be something special” and if they don’t do
everything that they can to give them that opportunity, then they
are not doing their job as a parent. So they tend to get a little
more over-involved than they really need to be.
I would bet that if you took a poll of the players
who have actually “gotten somewhere” – meaning
those currently playing professional hockey (or in the case of the
NHL, those locked out from playing professional hockey) –
you would find that most of them never really thought that they
were “anything special” or would be playing hockey professionally
until they had actually almost gotten there.
When Toronto Maple Leafs veteran Gary Roberts,
who has played in the NHL since the mid-1980’s, was asked
when he first thought he had a future in hockey, he replied, “When
I got a call from an agent before the draft. Before that, it was
just a game we played.”
Sure he dreamed of playing in the NHL. What kid
doesn’t? But he never really dared to expect that it would
happen. Most players had never even thought that they would play
junior or college hockey. Typically, they never thought any further
ahead than the current season they were playing in, probably no
further ahead than the next game or practice. Maybe that is why
hockey players are so good at using the cliché, “we’re
taking it one game at a time.” Because they actually do.
But lately, I think there are much higher expectations.
Maybe it’s because of the money that professional players
make. Maybe it’s because of the stardom and all of the attention
professional players get in the media. Or maybe it’s because
of the tremendous time and financial commitment that many parents
make for their child to play the game.
But today, there are many junior and college hockey
players expecting that they will be playing professionally, many
high-level midget and high school players expecting to play junior
or college hockey, and there are many youth players who actually
think that they are destined to go all the way. They don’t
just want results. They expect them.
To a certain degree, I guess there is nothing
wrong with that. It’s definitely a good thing to have a goal,
if it’s a realistic one. But for every junior or college player
that makes it at the professional level, there are literally thousands
who don’t and so on down the line.
So why worry about it? If it happens, it happens.
Do your best, and if you’re good enough, you will get your
chance. I think most players understand this because they are participating
in the game and it is something (if you are willing to learn) that
the game teaches you over time. Don’t focus on the result.
Focus on the little, achievable things that will get you the result
and you will do just fine.
But I think that message often gets lost on the
adults, who aren’t participating (at least physically) in
the game. They only understand results. In a game, the only result
good enough for them is a win. In their child’s “career”
the only result good enough is progress, taking that next step to
play at a higher level.
And in looking for that result, they often overlook
the little things that really are more important than the result
itself – things like making the right decision with the puck
in your own zone to start a rush up the ice, or beating someone
on-on-one with a move you have never tried before, or learning to
anticipate where the puck is going to go and getting there before
anyone else does.
And over the course of the season, there are things
like the verbal jousting that can only happen between teammates
before, after and during practices and games, the pregame rituals
of certain players to ensure that the hockey gods will be smiling
on their team that night, the highs and lows of the locker room
after big wins and tough losses, and of course that “chemistry”
that just seems to magically appear as players stop being individuals
and finally become teammates.
So, even though we live in a world where we are
conditioned to “keep our eye on the prize,” I think
it’s much more important – at least in youth sports
– that we forget about the destination and spend more time
enjoying the ride.
Because no matter how long it turns out to be,
it is never long enough.
Lyle Phair can be reached at feedback@hockeyjournal.com.
This article appears in the March issue of
New England Hockey Journal. Click here
to subscribe to the magazine.
|
